Been to the Bottom

It's 2003, I'm trying to button a pair of jeans, but they wont fit over my stomach. I'm crying and pulling my hair at how I've let myself get to this point. That was when everything changed for me. I started to eat healthy and exercise on a very regular basis.

I was in my prime, and I felt great about every choice I made. It was the first time in my life that I felt happy and just accepted myself. Then I met this guy.

My love for him runs deep. So does his love for food. Which in turn, allowed my love for food to come rolling back into my life. I thought I had a handle on my healthier lifestyle. In the beginning of us dating, I maintained my eating habits with some "unhealthy moments" but I still exercised and everything was alright. Then we moved in together and I believe it has been a very bad cliche of a downward spiral.  For example:

~What he ate, I ate

~When he laid on the couch, so did I

~His portions were my portions

~His lack of exercise was my lack of exercise

While I made note of these bad habits, and I did have some motivation at times, I have led myself back down a path to a very unhappy unhealthy pre-2003 girl. 

And I am done. Tomorrow is a new day, a new life, a start to a new me. Enough with talking, it's about doing.